How do you know if you had a good date or a bad date?
Some of us like to talk to our friends and break down the entire date, word-by-word, minute-by-minute, second-by-second. Some of us like to have a feeling. We get this intuition that the date went well.
Some of us are in creative mode where we have fantasies about that date. We think we’ve met our fantasy girl or our fantasy guy. This behavior starts relationships that never get anywhere because they’re very one-sided. There’s no such thing as a fantasy person. You’re basically giving your power away to somebody else, saying to the Universe that you’re not worthy of them and that’s why they’re your fantasy.
When I was dating, I only judged my dates by feelings and emotions. At the end of each date, I would drive home, and I would see how long that feeling lasted. Whether it was a day date or a night date didn’t make a difference-I would let that feeling last. I would check-in with myself to see if that feeling lasted; if it made me toss and turn a little bit when I went to bed or kept my mind racing for an hour because all I was thinking about was more.
Who are they? What are they all about?Maybe I’d think about things they said and think that I should have asked them a few more about it. I’ll make mental notes about maybe something that they said that I didn’t really go deeper into. Maybe I missed a huge chunk of the conversation because I was too busy checking her out, either way I would definitely write down in my mind what I want to talk to them about the next day.
It’s a feeling; it’s a wanting; it’s a longing. Good dates never end. It’s a constant building of desire. You want to constantly build desire so when you wake up the next morning you’ve got a few thoughts in your mind, questions you can ask the person.
“Hey you said the other night, the last time we went out, something about a trip that you were planning. I never even asked you where that trip is…”
What most people are looking for is romance. Romance is a continual process and it builds and builds and builds. So a good date is only as good as how long that feeling lasts.